Released in 2007, a highlight from the overall average Kingdom Come, Jay-Z gives us “30 Something”. Sure he might not be talking about being 30 exactly, because he was 37 at the time, but let me go through the lyrics and see where I stand.

Better broad – X No broad.
better automobile – ✓ Went from used to new so yes.
bet a hundred mill – X Not quite.
I’m young enough to know the right car to buy – ✓ Ok I’ll give myself a check here. I know the right car to buy is the affordable one.
Yet grown enough not to put rims on it – ✓ That’s a given.
I don’t got the bright watch, I got the right watch – ✓ Sure. My Skagen watch works great, isn’t “bright”, and gets plenty of compliments.
I don’t buy out the bar, I bought the night spot – X How bout I buy a round?
I got the right stock – X Been meaning to sign up with Fidelity. Anyone got some insider trading info for me??
I got stockbrokers that’s movin’ it like white tops – X But plenty of friends that work in finance.

30’s the new twenty,
I’m so hot still

I used to let my pants sag, not givin’ a fuck
Bad boy, now I’m all grown up – ✓ Fitted pants, slim cut shirts and tailored suits. All grown up is right.
I use to cruise the used car lot, put chrome on the truck
Bad boy, now I’m all grown up – ✓ True, I also used to cruise the used car lot, then I bought a new 2014 Chevy Cruze.
Now I got black cards, good credit and such – X Chase Freedom Unlimited actually. And sub-par credit if we’re being honest.

30’s the new twenty,
I’m on fire still

I’m a bully with the bucks – X Unfortunately not.
I got the fully in the tux – X I don’t even own a tux, never mind got the “fully” in one!
I don’t got one gun army, got a slum army – X For sure not.

30’s the new twenty, 
I’m so hot still

Y’all roll blunts, I smoke Cubans all day – X All day? No. Cubans? I’ve smoked one or two I think. Usually just whatever I’m offered or can afford. 
Y’all youngin’s chase, I’m Patron, and it’s Grey – X Never had good tequila, still gotta get on that. Who’s buyin’?
I like South Beach, but I’m in Saint Tropez – X Hoping to visit Naples soon.
Y’all drink Dom but not Rose – X I’d rather have a beer
My chick burnin’ down Bergdolph’s – X Never even heard of it.
Comin’ back with Birken Bags – X How bout a pair of Allbirds?
I’m from the era where playas don’t snitch – ✓ Same, snitches continue to get stitches.
I’m afraid of the future (why?) – ✓ Hard yes.
Y’all respect the one who got shot
I respect the shooter – X/✓ Don’t quite understand this one, calling it a wash.
Y’all go to parties to ice grill
I go to parties to party with nice girls – ✓ If invited, of course.

You young boys gotta chill
30’s the new twenty
I’m so hot still

Okay, so I have a lot of work to do!